Saturday, February 3, 2007
Skinned Alive 1989
Tempe Entertainment released Skinned Alive on dvd about four years ago. It was actually produced by J.R. Bookwalter (owner of Tempe) back in the mid eighties and was available for rent or purchase in 1989. I have no idea how I missed out on this film as a kid. Think 'Three Stooges mixed with The Texas Chainsaw Massacre ' and you can draw your own conclusion.
John Killough (director) was only around twenty when he shot this flick. The budget was around twenty bucks, so don't expect some glossy Hollywood flop here. If Cheese and high brow comedy mixed with gore and hinted incest burns your esophagus, don't try watching this flick. You'll overdose on Pepto Bismol.
Crawldaddy's is a traveling hide tanning service (Ha!) consisting of 'Crawldaddy' and her son and daughter. (Crawldaddy is one eyed female paraplegic who uses the foulest language you've ever heard - and insists that her son Fink (Scott Spiegel) and daughter Violet (Susan Rothacker) call her 'Daddy') They're on their daily rounds when they kill a hitchhiker and a fat fuzzy-headed salesman. Their van soon breaks down where they meet a mechanic and his eccentric Wife - Tom and Minnie Miles - (Played by: Lester Clark, Barbara Norrod)
Being the slow minded individuals they are, they ask the crew to spend the night until the van is repaired. The scuzzy crew accept the offer and lodge themselves in the middle aged couple's basement.
An alcoholic ex-cop named Paul (Floyd Ewing Jr) - who lives next door to Tom and Minnie - who's now homebound and drunk due to a divorce, reminisces of the good old days - before his marriage fell apart and before he shot that Mexican woman in a junkyard, which eventually ruined his career as a policeman. He's now downing a half a fifth of vodka in one shot and pretty much dazes himself out as early as 8:30 in the morning.
We're treated to some gonzo divorce talk between our drunk ex-cop and his wife. Apparently, his wife plans on taking everything he owns - the house - the car - the dog - Not only this, she's sleeping with her lawyer. If you like dialog that will make you giggle even tho you know it's awful, get prepared to be entertained even tho you know you shouldn't be.
John Killough also wrote the film and tried to give us some of the raunchiest dialog you'll ever hear. Some scene are completely hilarious while some shots are just plain sick. Violet and Fink are supposed to be brother and sister, but act more like a disgruntled couple.
There's one scene that involves Fink and his sister in a hot and steamy 'love scene' There's a bugged out Scott Spiegel fumbling like a fool with the semi-pretty Susan Rothaker's leather bra. (This is the funniest thing I've ever seen) There's this silly music playing in the background that adds a bit of a lighthearted feel to the movie even tho the subject matter is just plain sick.
There's a scene that has a delivery boy (who just so happens to be delivering a set of kitchen knives to the mechanics wife) who gets his fingers chopped off by Crawldaddy. He jumps in his car and travels a piece down the road only to have Violet blow his brains out from the back seat. Good stuff.
Everything in the film inspires madness and chaos. Derived from the mind of a young John Killough, this is a movie that should be watched by a bunch of drunk friends. The dialog alone gives it a personal friend feel - as the language used seems like something I would say in a drunk conversation with the group. Some really zany stuff. "Cheese dick" - "Selfish ridden bitch." "Stay here you little dingle berry, That fuckwad's mine!" "Lick my plate you dog dick!" - Wait....wrong movie.
Anyway, 'Skinned Alive' could very well be classified as a slasher, although I'd prefer to call it something like 'gonzo horror'. This is simply because I've never really watched a flick quiet like it. Shoddy camera work. Bad picture quality -There's a text statement by Bookwalter that says they did everything possible to restore the film to an outstanding quality, but we would have to simply live with what we get. It's bad, but the lighting was good. The quality of the picture really has nothing to do with lighting.
Our drunkard policeman realizes that this group of strange individuals are offing people left and right. He soon learns that they have attempted to kill Tom the Mechanic. His wife Minnie has her arm chopped off in grizzly fashion - leaving her to bleed to death. Paul takes matters into his on hands and goes Rambo on our bunch of goons. [He should have just called in Ranger Mark Obrien and he could have sedated these bunch of idiots.]
Paul shoots and kills Crawldaddy - her bullet ridden body pulverized and torn by bloody bullets. You'll forget all about the fact that its actually a garbage bag filled with stage blood - sporting Crawldaddy's (Mary Jackson's) clothes on it.
There's a final showdown against 'Evil Dead 2's' Scott Spiegel and Flowd Ewing Jr. After Fink gets his nose bitten off, he still manages to worry about his vain appearance. He has the nerve to call Paul a 'cannibal motherfucker.' Oh man. This movie really can't be put into words.
Crawldaddy also eats up her share of celluloid. Mary Jackson goes all out with her role. I cannot begin to explain the comic touch Jackson added to the film. Again, I've never seen anything like it. Buy the time it was over, my stomach was sore from laughing so much. My brow was constantly raised, but with a constant smile throughout its entire running time.
I'll recommend this to any horror fan. A zany ride that will have you watching this flick more times than you'll ever admit to.
Scott Spiegel (Fink) is the star of the show. He eats up the scenery and gives us a brand of comedy laden with Larry, Moe, and Curly that you won't forget anytime after. This should be the poster flick for films that are so bad they're good. I cannot recommend this flick enough. Buy it NOW ''cheese dick!''
This flick is now available on a Brentwood pack of the same name.
There were a lot of struggle between director Killoguh and Bookwalter. (producer)
Fink was actually played by another guy other than Scott Spiegel, but he dropped out leaving Spiegel to fill his shoes. A scene in the movie that involves Fink is actually the other guys head.
Floyd Ewing Jr had second thoughts about appearing in 'Skinned alive- Stating that the dialog was a little too harsh for him.
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